Last week’s post about engagement ring selfies got us thinking. If guys are too afraid to make a commitment – to an engagement ring, not the woman they love, mind you – how does a bride ever go about getting the rock she wants on her finger?
The Telegraph article we quoted insists that the couples simply shop together after the guy’s already proposed (the couple referenced young men frozen in fear by letting down their female fiancee’s, though we do wonder if our same sex couples have the same anxiety.) But what about couples who go ring shopping together before the proposal? Is this a good idea?
If you read our April Fool’s Day post from this year, you can probably guess what we’re going to say.
We think it’s a great idea to go ring shopping together.
Today’s couples do things differently, even when it is just the groom shopping solo for a surprise ring. The new way our generation shops is the entire reason we opened Diamonds by Raymond Lee! And more than ever, we entertain clientele who browse for the perfect engagement ring together.
In years past, we used to see the bride pop by with her mom, or sister, or friends once or twice to scope out the selection, see what she liked, and leave her preferences with us or in the trusted #hinthint skills of her shopping partner. The groom would follow days/weeks/months later and usually buy the style she preferred, if not the exact ring she had fallen in love with.
Today, more often the groom himself is her shopping partner. The process is usually the same, they’ll come in to get an idea of what they like and can afford, either on a random afternoon or at one of our shopping events. He typically comes back or calls to finalize the ring purchase so she’s still a little surprised (plus, you know, the proposal itself is often a surprise, even if the ring isn’t.)
We also see lots of couples who come in and walk out with their dream ring purchased, whether that was their plan or not. It’s rare we see an actual in store proposal (though those ARE amazing!) But plenty of times we’ll see a couple come in “just to look” and a bride falls so head over heels in love with a ring or setting that her partner says “Let’s do this.”
Both halves of the couple are usually surprised and giddy by this, and a proposal is left hanging in the air, but impending. It’s still a great surprise. And for some brides, choosing the ring they’ll wear every day for, oh, ever, is something they’d prefer to be in control of, and leave the romantic proposal a surprise.
But personal preference isn’t the only reason the modern couple shops together. This generation gets married later than any other. So in the years before a couple gets engaged, odds are good that they’ve already began building their life together. They might already share a mortgage, and financial goals, so a purchase as large as an engagement ring is something they both want to be a part of.
They share in their household’s expenses and income more equally, so they like to be on the same page about what each partner is comfortable spending on a ring.
This says nothing of couples who already have kids together – their lives are already so entwined it just doesn’t make sense to them that they wouldn’t shop for a ring together!
We see more couples than ever before ring shopping together, and these are just a few reasons why they might. Regardless of how you shop and with whom you shop, we’re here to make sure you get the perfect ring that you both love.